The big news with this fallís initial wave of new movie releases is what a big disappointment they are at the box office. Not even a Halloween unveiling of the Blair Witch sequel or the inspired teaming of John Travolta and Phoebe Buffay could entice the masses to make the trip to the nearest multiplex and plunk down the moolah required for admittance. Iím not surprised that people are avoiding this current crop of potential crap, Iím just a little hurt that theyíre deciding to not see these movies before I tell them not to. Oh well, for those of you who still need a voice of reason to listen to other than your own, hereís the latest rundown.

Casting Elizabeth Hurley as the devil in this updated remake of the Peter Cook-Dudley Moore comedy cult classic is a great idea. As Satan, she gets to be the ultimate naughty girl and seduce someone into selling his soul. Imagine the costume possibilities! Ah, but thereís a catch. The someone whose soul sheís after is played by Brendan Fraser, the lackluster actor who has made a living out of such naive nitwit roles. Funny, I thought the Dudley Doright debacle would've put his one-trick pony career out its misery. Apparently not.

The latest film from Christopher Guest, one of the men responsible for This is Spinal Tap, which is one of the funniest movies ever made. Word of mouth says Best in Show is good, but not as good as Guestís last effort, Waiting for Guffman. Since I havenít seen that movie yet, it only makes since that I should before I see this one. After all, why eat cookies when you havenít tried the cheesecake?

Every once in awhile a movie comes along that makes you wanna stand up and shout, "What the hell is this?" I think Billy Elliot could be one of those movies. And, of course, the critics just love it to pieces.

I have no idea what this sequel to last yearís surprise runaway hit is all about, but I do know the real mystery has nothing to do with the plot of the film. Itís the strange disappearance at the box office of all the people who paid money to see the original Blair Witch Project. As for yours truly, I didnít see the first one and Iím not gonna see this one either. (And it doesnít look like I have to worry about not seeing a third installment.)

Ben Affleck and Gweneth Paltrow are two strangers who fall in love... zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

One white. One black. One blonde. Oops, sorry wrong TV crime fighting threesome to make the jump to the big screen. Maybe this one wonít be a huge turd like The Mod Squad or stink up the big screen as bad as the celluloid version of The Avengers. Once again three hot babes are plucked from their mundane lives by a mysterious benefactor named Charlie and given carte blanche to fight crime while wearing expensive designer clothes. Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore and Lucy Liu are the big screen angels and plenty of karate kicks and explosions are sure to provide a majority of the fun. But something tells me I should just wait until this movie is released on DVD and hope thereís a special feature where I can access all the Billy Murray parts with one touch of the remote.

Whatís the last thing you wanna see after being constantly bombarded by TV, radio and press coverage of the election circus? Right, a movie about politics. This one has Joan Allen as a senator who could become the first female vice president of the United States when the current V.P. dies and President Jeff Bridges tabs her to fill the vacancy. But things hit a snag when perpetual mean guy Gary Oldam digs up some dirt from the senatorís murky past that could nix her appointment. And I donít mean the fact she had a small part in Peggy Sue Got Married.

Not to be confused with the 1953 film, The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T. In that classic, Hans Conried is a mad piano teacher who kidnaps children and forces them to play at recitals. This time around, Richard Gere takes over the title role as a gynecologist who has something better to do with his fingers than teach a bunch of brats how to play "Chopsticks." Helen Hunt, Farrah Fawcett, Shelly Long, Laura Dern and Liv Tyler provide Gere with a nice smorgasbord of female costars in this movie directed by Robert Altman (M*A*S*H, Nashville, Popeye), but I donít think it turns out to be the game of musical bed partners one might expect given the title and cast. Besides, whenís the last time you really wanted to watch a movie starring Richard Gere?

I already reviewed this movie when it was originally scheduled for release this summer. For some reason the studio decided to hold back itís premiere until now, perhaps thinking a film about golf wasnít quite the big grabber needed to go up against the box office appeal of Godzilla, Pokemon or the bar top dancing babes of Coyote Ugly. Well, they were right about one thing. The competition is a lot more vulnerable right now. But this is still a film about golf, so why bother?

Wow, even box officer supersnot Adam Sandler can't seem to get the turnstiles in motion with his latest epic. Maybe his fans are turned off by the retarded brother of Emo Phillips look he came up with for his new film role. In Little Nicky, Sandler is the son of the devil, a demon with a good heart who goes to Earth because if he didnít there wouldnít be any movie. So naturally, this modern day version of Hot Suff is gonna be the proverbial fish-out-of-water and all sorts of silly things are gonna happen when he walks among mortals. And some of them might even tickle a funny bone or two. I have to admit, I sometimes find Adam Sandler to be a funny guilty pleasure. Yeah, his brand of comedy is somewhat idiotic but thereís a "dumbass at the back of the classroom" quality that causes me to let my guard down and laugh at humor that on the surface should be well beneath my standards. Maybe thatís why Billy Madison is his funniest movie. Because he really plays the dumbass at the back of the classroom. Anyway, Iíll just wait and watch Little Nicky when it comes out on video. No way Iím gonna sit in a theater full of stupid Adam Sandler fans.

Man, John Travolta is getting a big head, and I mean that literally. That is one wide ass noggin heís carrying around. I wonder if they have to use a special lens for close-ups. Anyway, this new flick is Vinnie Barbarinoís attempt to rebound from the box office bomb Battlefield Earth, but it doesnít look like movie goers are breaking out into a rousing chorus of "Welcome Back." The plot falls into that "wacky kooky caper" niche and involves a scam to rip off the lottery. Itís a good plan, of course, but then things start to go wrong and thatís when the hilarity is unleashed. Yeah, kinda reminiscent of Whoís Minding the Mint? but without the comic talents of Milton Berle, Joey Bishop and Victor Buono to help pull it off. (Not to mention the directorial skills of Howard "Ernest T. Bass" Morris.) Sorry, there isnít anything lucky about this movie and already its number seems to be up. But if you need one more reason not to go see it,. Iíve got three words for you: Co-starring Lisa Kudrow.

What would a Movie Guide be without another Robert DeNiro film to review? This time he plays a mean but fair son of a bitch in this "true story" of the first African American to become a master diver in the U.S. Navy. Yeah, I know DeNiro is a great actor, but he doesnít play the part of the black diver. That role goes to Cuba Gooding, Jr., who won an Academy Award for his "show me the money" performance in Jerry Maguire. Sounds like a noble film in which two talented actors spend a lot of their time goofiní around in those big Diver Dan suits while small brained racists cause all sorts of trouble. Since the story is the main thing, I donít see any reason why you canít wait until this movie comes on TV to watch it. A bigot is still a bigot no matter what size screen you see him on, plus all those water scenes are just gonna make you wanna run to the bathroom anyway.

This sure sounds like a motion picture hybrid. Take the actress who won the Best Actress Oscar two years ago (Helen Hunt), pair her up with the Best Actor winner from last year (Kevin Spacey) and toss in the kid who got nominated for a supporting award but didnít win because they hardly ever give an Oscar to a kid. (Haley Joel Omelet). Then run all kinds of promotional trailers that make the film look quirky but donít give the viewer a real idea what the film is about. (Like the campaign for American Beauty.) My gut feeling? A movie with all the right ingredients but no one was following the recipe. And is it just me or is Helen Hunt starting to look very weird, in a nasty white trash hooker kinda way?