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I would do
anything for love but I won't do that.
Meat Loaf - To
Hell & Back [VH-1] I don't know which was worse -
sitting through the insufferably bad lip-syncs of the
ridiculously long edits of the songs or the ever changing
width of the puttied gap put between Meat's teeth. I
mean, come on - when you think of Meat Loaf, the first thing
that comes to your mind is the teeth, right? And we
all know that the songs are long - but the fact that they
had so much "performance" time led me to
believe that there really wasn't a two-hour movie to be
made. Fat kid gets picked on by drunk Dad until he
becomes a big star, loses it all and gets it back.
Sounds like a tidy hour to me. How about that Todd
segment? I've seen Todd Rundgren, I know a lot about
Todd Rundgren, Todd Rundgren's a favorite of mine.
Senator, that was no Todd Rundgren. Anyway, there was
less drama in the two hours of that phlegm than there is in
even the shortest Jim Steinman song, and these terrible
biopics are the sure sign that VH-1 is slowly becoming your
parent's MTV. Why can't somebody just show two goddamn
hours of videos for a change? The only high point of
the film was watching the dollar signs fly by as the
licensed footage from Rocky Horror was cut together with
more bad lip-synching. And the bad Tim Curry
impersonation was a hoot, too.
They're shutting
down Napster. Temporarily. Hoo-ray. Judge
Patel said in court "Evidence has been established of
copyright infringement, which should be no surprise to
Napster, since that was the purpose of it. Napster
was, and continues to be, a way to copy music without the
permission of the copyright holders." I heard a
better description which likened Napster to record stores
that carry bongs & pipes. These stores know full
well that the accessories will be used to smoke illegal
substances - yet they sell them under the guise of people
buying them to smoke tobacco. Yeah, when's the last
time you saw someone smoking a bong load of tobacco?
Now, the trick will be to locate and prosecute any other
little tech-fucks who start up Napster-esque sites.
I'd personally like to piss on their hard drives.
What is up with
the new ABC campaign that uses The Cars' "You're All
I've Got Tonight"? Who's all who's got tonight?
That's not a very positive song to use to get people to
watch your programming. In fact, it's insulting in any
way you direct it. "You can knock me, I don't
care. You can mock me and I don't care...it's all
right. You're all I've got tonight." Who is
the dumbass that approved that campaign?
Favorite Song Of
All Time This Week©: "TV Is King" - The
Tubes
I am
thoroughly creeped out by those sandwich size pickles.
Are they cut from gigantic cucumbers or do they
"make" them with a pickle cutter & a
pickle sheet? And, it's not like pickles on hamburgers
are even a good idea in the first place. Okay, you got
your texture issue - but onions have the same texture
quotient and taste much better. I say stay away.
No good can come from a pickle with a 5" diameter.
I realized this
week that I really like Judas Priest.
Happy Birthday
To Thee From LEE This Week©:
07/28/40
Phil Proctor
07/30/33
Edd "Kookie" Byrnes
07/31/45
Gary Lewis
Favorite Album Of All Time This Week©:
I Think We're All Bozos On This Bus -
Firesign Theatre
Yee-ah.
Colleen gets a little cranky when she don't get no cock,
don't she. And hooray for Rudy. Remember the
Survivor motto starts with "out-wit". Not
nit-wit, Sean. Or, should we start calling you Dr.
Dumbass? Gee, letting everyone know when
they'll be voted off is a good idea because...?
Okay, you stupid fuck - your stupid plan saved Gervase and
now it's saved Richard. Well, Colleen has Dick
on the island for at least another three days...
Have any of
you poor, deaf souls who bought any Alanis Morrissette
record tried to play it recently? I heard "You
Oughtta Know" on the radio the other day, and besides
sounding tremendously dated, it's even more of a cluttered,
cacophonous caterwaul than I remember. I just wonder
if that song or "Ironic" will be the one-hit she's
wondered for.
Question Of The
Week©: Which is the better Jim Steinman song -
"Making Love Out Of Nothing At All" or "Total
Eclipse Of The Heart"?
©2000 Lee M.
Lodyga
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