LakinLandís
Ultimate Prime Time TV ScheduleOkay, the television networks have wallowed in their incompetence long enough. Itís time to take matters into my own hands and come up with the definitive prime time schedule. Choosing from all the programs that have been broadcast over the years, I have devised a balanced lineup that should please any right minded TV viewer who is fed up with trying to find something good to watch amongst the endless stream of crap that has been foisted upon us over the years.
First, the rules. The criteria for a show making the lineup is simple. If I think it belongs, then it belongs. It doesnít necessarily have to be a great or groundbreaking show. It just has to be something I want to watch. After all, this ainít Shakespeare weíre talking about, which is why none of his TV shows made the cut or were even considered.
When possible, shows were scheduled on a night and near a time slot they occupied during their actual run on the networks or cable. Since this could not always be accomplished, some juggling had to be done and often programs were placed where they fit nicely into the lineup or just looked good on the page. Also note that the LakinLand prime time schedule is longer than the current one offered by the big four television networks. Thatís because I have reinstated the extra half hour of programming the affiliates snatched away when they needed more commercial time to run PSAís during local or syndicated shows.
In some instances, I have provided a summer replacement series for certain shows. This helps break up the monotony of reruns and allows me to squeeze more shows onto the schedule. You might consider this cheating, but I like to think of it as "getting my big baby way." And since itís my schedule, Iím entitled.
And now, without further commercial interruption, I present to you the LakinLand ultimate prime time television schedule...
Saturday
7:00 - 7:30 The Bullwinkle Show/Beany & Cecil
7:30 - 8:00 Bob & Ray
8:00 - 8:30 Get Smart
8:30 - 9:00 All In The Family
9:00 - 9:30 The Bob Newhart Show
9:30 -10:00 Second City TV
10:00-11:00 The Hollywood Palace
Sunday
7:00 - 8:00 Maverick
8:00 - 8:30 The Simpsons
8:30 - 9:00 Monty Pythonís Flying Circus/Fawlty Towers (Summer)
9:00 -10:00 The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour
10:00-11:00 The Sopranos/The Prisoner (Summer)
11:00-12:00 The Sportswriters On TV
Monday
7:30 - 8:00 The Monkees
8:00 - 8:30 Hullabaloo/Shindig
8:30 - 9:00 The Honeymooners
9:00 - ???? Monday Night Football
Off Season:
9:00 - 10:00 Quincy/Banacek
10:00- 11:00 VH-1ís Behind The Music
Tuesday
7:30 - 8:00 The Andy Griffith Show
8:00 - 8:30 The Jackie Thomas Show
8:30 - 9:00 Taxi
9:00 - 9:30 Barney Miller
9:30 -10:00 Buffalo Bill
10:00-11:00 St. Elsewhere
Wednesday
7:30 - 8:00 Batman
8:00 - 8:30 The Dick Van Dyke Show
8:30 - 9:00 Green Acres
9:00 -10:00 The Johnny Cash Show
10:00-11:00 Law & Order
Thursday
7:30 - 8:00 Batman (Conclusion)
8:00 - 8:30 Cheers
8:30 - 9:00 News Radio
9:00 - 9:30 Seinfeld
9:30 -10:00 The Larry Sanders Show
10:00-11:00 Hill Street Blues
Friday
7:30 - 8:00 The Bugs Bunny Show
8:00 - 8:30 The Green Hornet
8:30 - 9:00 The Partridge Family
9:00 - 9:30 Hoganís Heroes
9:30 -10:00 Twilight Zone
10:00-11:00 The Man From U.N.C.L.E.
Special Programming Note: Once or twice a month, an episode of Columbo starring Peter Falk will be run in various time slots. Due to its starís refusal to commit to a weekly series, the show originally aired on NBC in rotation with two other mystery programs, but I donít want to watch those shows. Instead, Iíll just do things my way and run Columbo whenever I want.
Network Scorecard
Hereís how the various networks fared in the selection of this schedule. Note that a point is given for every show whether itís in the regular lineup or just a summer replacement series. If a show appeared on more than one network (i.e. Get Smart, Taxi) credit is given to the one where it made its biggest impact. And although Batman appears two nights on the schedule, it is counted as only one show.
NBC - 16
ABC - 13
CBS - 10
HBO - 2
PBS - 2*
FOX - 1
VH-1 - 1
Syndication - 1
Dumont - 0
*shows originally from the BBC