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F & R The Breast Little Half-Time Show in Texas On February 9th, 1964, The Beatles made their first appearance on "The Ed Sullivan Show" and changed the world of pop music forever. Not only did these guys play their own instruments and sing, but they also wrote their own songs. And they did it all without ever having to show their naughty bits on stage. Forty years later... Angry viewers flooded CBS with phone calls and emails after song and dance man Justin Timberlake ripped off part of Janet Jacksonís costume during the half-time show of the Super Bowl and revealed one of Miss Jacksonís breasts. Most of the complaints cited the performance as disgusting and appalling, and some even had nasty things to say about the partial nudity. Afterwards, both the ripper and the rippee blamed the unfortunate flashing on a wardrobe malfunction...which is the same excuse many high school boys give for not losing their virginity in the back seat of a car after the prom. CBS and MTV were jointly embarrassed by the Jackson-Timberlake incident and insisted they had no idea their half-time show was going to turn into a live ad for "Girls Gone Wild." The NFL said it is unlikely they will allow MTV to produce another half-time show for them and immediately announced next yearís extravaganza will be co-headlined by Up With People and the Wiggles. Justin Timberlakeís 'N Sync buddy JC Chasez was booted off the half-time show for the Pro Bowl (imagine losing that gig!) because his song lyrics were deemed too racy in the aftermath of the Super Bowl debacle. Instead, the entertainment committee for the all-star game settled on a Hawaiian theme, but didnít invite Do Ho to sing because some viewers might find his last name offensive. Film Director Spike Lee criticized Miss Jacksonís peek-a-boob routine by calling it a "new low" in attention-getting antics by entertainers. And then he sued the NFL for using his name every time a player slams the ball into the ground after scoring a touchdown. Why did Nelly grab his crotch so much during his performance at the Super Bowl? Because he can. Remember when Aerosmith was big enough to be the main attraction for the Super Bowl half-time show? This year they were relegated to opening act status and performed in between a Willie Nelson-Toby Keith duet and the national anthem as sung by Columbia recording artist Beyonce, who was not nearly naked enough to warrant her appearance. And speaking of dressing up for the big game, how about Kid Rock using the American flag as a poncho during his portion of the half-time program? He was going to wear Old Glory Speedos, too, but had to nix that idea when told there was no reason to fly the flag at half mast at this point in time. A week after the Super Bowl, CBS had the honor of broadcasting the Grammy Awards, but they wouldnít let Justin Timberlake or Janet Jackson appear unless they apologized on air for their previous naughtiness. Janet declined to show up, but Justin was there to recite his mantra of regret during his acceptance speech. And then he thanked his mom, who was in the audience wearing a dress that explained how Justin acquired his primal urge to grab at hooters in the first place. Prince opened the telecast by performing a medley of his really old stuff. Beyonce joined him on stage and then went on to win five Grammy Awards for her debut solo album. Youíll have to look it up, but I think that was more than any Beatles album ever won. Then again, they have so many categories now, itís hard to not win a Grammy these days. Just ask the new super group, Gorbachev, Clinton & Loren. Need further proof that it doesnít take much to win a Grammy? Al Franken got one for reading his own book. It was good to see the USC Trojan Marching Band back together again, but what were they doing adding their trademark "Tusk" sound to an Outkast song? And is anyone really surprised that Native Americans were offended by the green Indian getups worn during the performance of the feel good song of the year? Yes, just another example of the black man ripping off the white manís music and making fun of the red man while doing it. Grammy High: Itís a toss up between an amazing performance by the White Stripes or Celine Dionís microphone not working. Grammy Low: No Johnny Cash tribute. Whatís up with that? On the other hand, at least no one got the chance to mess up the words to "Ring of Fire" during the Grammys. Címon, how hard can it be to get "I Saw Her Standing There" right? Having four guys come out and play it without extra backup was a good idea. They just picked the wrong four guys. And in unrelated sad news... F&R bids farewell to Captain Kangaroo and Ray Rayner, two legends in children's programming that made getting up in the morning a lot more fun during the wonder years. Actually, Rayner was a part of our entire day during his stint at WGN in Chicago. Before we went to school, we ate breakfast while we watched him on his own show, "Ray Rayner & Friends." Then when we came home for lunch we watched him as Oliver O. Oliver on "Bozoís Circus." And when school was out, he hosted cartoon programs like "Dick Tracy" and "Rocket to Adventure." Yes, he and the Captain will be missed, but as long as there are post-it notes and ping pong balls, neither will ever be forgotten. Fuck and Run- "The Archives" is right here in case you missed an edition. |